I have clothes from two years ago. From five years ago. From college. I even found a pair of pants from high school.
I am emotionally attached to my clothes. This is the dress I graduated in. I was wearing this dress on our first anniversary. This is the dress I was wearing when I closed my first contract.
I am financially attached to my clothes. This suit was 100 dollars. This one was a bargain at 12.99. I waited three months for this to go on sale.
I have guilt about my clothes. I only wore this once. This was my “I am going to lose ten lbs!” purchase.
And we have a clothing problem. I end up in tears trying to find a great outfit and seeing the closet full of old dreams, great finds, things I never quite looked as good in as the day I bought it. We get to a point where my clothes are neatly folded and lined up against the wall. Where the clothes cover the floors from frantically trying to get dressed for work and feeling hideous in everything. Clothes, clothes everywhere.
My ten best work outfits never get hung up. They are in the washer. Or the dryer. Or on the floor because there was no space for it in my drawers that are filled with things I no longer wear.
I get that this is ridiculous. I get that. I really need 7-10 work outfits to rotate, and when they are worn out, I could replace them. That’s what I end up doing anyway, despite the closets and drawers full of clothes.
So today I am saying goodbye. I am saying goodbye to my favorite dress that has an un-fixable run in it that has taken up space in my closet for the last 2 years because I am emotionally attached to that perfect dress. Goodbye to the suits I bought in 2010 when I was 10 lbs lighter, and they were a perfect fit at the time. Goodbye to sweater that shrunk in the wash and was never quite the same. Goodbye to the now-stained dress I bought at a Target in Charlottesville the last time I visited one of my best college friends who I have since essentially lost touch with. Goodbye to the memories. Goodbye to the weight loss dreams. Goodbye to the wasted space, the frustrations, and the tears.
Today, I am cleaning my closet. And my heart.